The art of heart in hand

Four marks on my hand. No one knows the meanings of these but God, a book and I. The meanings of these is my greatest secret at the moment. Why I am writing these things I do not know. Other then I fell the urge to. It may just be part of perfecting the self. Place things in God's hands when your not sure about it yourself.

Well speaking of happy things, let us speak of Brei. Brei, what can be said about one of the top ten girls that I know.

{quick side note}

I have a list of top ten girls I know they are not in a order for I could not decide between them. {end of side note}

She is the sweetest thing I remember about Utah. Like a cupcake, but don't call her a cupcake. She has now told me that she is trying to be sweeter. Cause she was thought of as rude after hanging around nothing but stinky boys. I thought that this would be like putting sugar on that cupcake. Yeah it maybe sweeter but what is the point. It just sounds weird. She has a picture of a baby being happy in the tub. With a quick look one easily thinks some thing else is happening other then it getting water poured on it. She also has the greatest Beaker impression in the world. It still haunts my dreams. She has no name in my phone for she has changed her number sense I have moved. When I finally get it again she will most likely be sassy grass. No one can tell Brei what to do. Even if you say "Do what you want." This is still not aloud cause one would be telling her what to do then also. I have used this joke. Not to the full effect that she has been able to pull it off. It works none the less. Brei has a real gift for music. She knows and likes all the best bands. She can play the piano better then anyone I know. Brei is not a cheese but if she was I think it would be very tasteful. She also just met kip from Napoleon Dynamite. I am very bad at keeping in touch with people who are not around me. Cause if I think about them too much I want to hang out and be with them. I worry about them (I get this from my mother) and Brei would not have me worrying about her. I believe she would beat me up for such things. She once took a picture of me that looks like I went off and killed myself right after. I loved that picture I was I had a copy. She was also the first person I took on my motorcycle when I got it. I don't think I ever told her that. I didn't want her to get scared. I didn't want to get scared. She is the only girl outside my family that I can say love to and have it fit. I do not love her like a man loves a woman, but as a person loves another person. I would gladdy take bullets for you Brei. And god willing take you out to tea.

I have thought long and hard about what it is to love. I never understood how to size up my likes and dislikes in my head. I once heard that if you love someone you would take a bullet for them. This didn't work for me cause I would take a bullet for anyone. I had many a issue with this. How can I define my friends from others. Then they said that friends are the ones you spend your time with when you have time. And you make time to spend. The only reason I don't hang out with people I don't know is cause it is weird. I know that I could easily make "friends" with them if given the right event. So the lines of society melted a way. I started to treat everyone the same. Not like strangers and not like friends. Everyone seemed to get this friend who I don't really know thing from me. I have recently how every come up with a defining boundary for my social order. If I really like them I would take 2 bullets. and others would stand there till it took 10 strong men to carry my body out. I hope to keep my lack of boundaries with people I don't know. While still treating my friends better.